some bands...

S = (lots of bands)/(not many hours)

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Sam The Sham and The Pharaohs - a rare two hit wonder! Somehow they hit it big with "Little Red Riding Hood" and, of course, "Wooly Bully". Endless proof that dumb = catchy, or complete nonsense in the case of the one about discourteous sheep??

One of my earliest memories is of a commercial for "Night Court" featuring the big bald guy dancing around to The Sham's pseudo-lyrical number. Such a valuable growth experience.

Also, as I seem to be pointing out as often as possible, the one with the comprehensible story could almost always be found in the van's CD changer...

Santana - as in Carlos. Many accuse him of selling out by calling in guitar solos for everyone under the sun, but pragmatically, he's freaking amazing! He's another musician who can't seem to play a wrong note. We did "Smooth" in jazz band, but I think I was the only one who liked it. Pues, busca "Oye Como Va". You should listen how it goes.

Sausage - Gentlemen, start your engines! It's the first of a zillion bands upon which I shall elaborate that include my real musical obsession, the wonderfully bizarre bassist Les Claypool.

With that fanfare, I anticlimactically point out that Sausage's lone album is, umm, boring. It's Les and two of his earliest cohorts playing mostly empty-sounding, overly long, and insufficiently odd concoctions. There are two significant highlights, though. First, the title track "Riddles Are Abound Tonight" is a live staple with almost every Claypool side project, and definitely better live. Second, the album includes "Toyz 1988", which is a ridiculous whammy-and-tap remix - or maybe the original version? - of "The Toys Go Winding Down", which appears on Primus' album "Frizzle Fry".

To quote Ray while typing away at work, "uhh, can I have something else?"

Scott Joplin - irritates me. Sorry; like Nickelback, it's all the same. He gets a mention for creating the ragtime genre, but he can stay in that era.

Seeed - electroreggae? Works for me!

Sepultura - this is the angriest music on the planet. Fast, angry guitar. Angry chords. Angry solos. Angry drums. On the occasion that you can understand his angry yelling, it's angry lyrics. Grrr!

Sex Pistols - some of the original punks, and pretty much mandatory for any punkollection. Plus, he rhymes "anarchist" with "antichrist". I won't get into it here, but Sid Vicious and friends have an interesting backstory, mostly of drugs, almost dying, and not actually knowing how to play any instruments.

Shi-Yue - screaming Japanese girl on top of noise guitar. Think injured cat. Yet, this is the kind of stuff I like.

The Shins - what, jl likes something semi-popular?? They have a light, happy sound, and their front man has a unique-but-frighteningly-pleasant voice... It's one of the few groups I can actually identify on Indie Pop Rocks! The deal was sealed en mi corazón when I found their cover of a song from The Postal Service. Sigh...

Shirley Bassey - did the theme songs for three James Bond Movies. She was probably popular for actual good music too, but the Bond themes are much more worth mentioning because of their over-the-top horror. "Golllldfingaa... wah waah wahh!"

Shizuo - noise noise noise! He/they? is/are a founder of the Digital Hardcore genre, and if you recognize that term, you're already disgusted. If you're not familiar, lucky you. Also in digital hardcore are EC8OR and Atari Teenage Riot, among very few others. The bro Tim and I are literally the only people I have ever run across who actively choose to listen to this. So, enjoy.

Shocking Blue - accredited with "Venus", and not much else... Worth mentioning because they did that song without knowing any English. They're sort of obviously Scandanavian when they say "joor desire" instead of "your desire". I don't know any other Shocking Blue songs, but I assume they gots da skilz.

Simon and Garfunkel - you know who they are. I feel obligated to mention them, but I don't really have any S&G stories; add some in the comments!

The Sims [soundtrack] - sorry, not even a band per se, but mad props to who ever did this stuff for creating the multi-genred tunes and wordless lyrics to several squandered years of my life.

Six Ways 'til Sunday - ha ha, so once upon a time there was this rumored ska band that really just hung out in one of the members' tool sheds, bothering to play music just often enough to make the neighbors angry... Anyway, they were good except for the front man, they wrote maybe two songs and covered about two more, and you should ask jarmstro about them.

Skinny Puppy - mandatory non-pop industrial rock. If you don't know what industrial rock is, just move on.

Slayer - the metal band, known for being in some ridiculous hurry! They'll throw together a song with seven verses, nine chorus repeats, and five separate guitar solos, and it will come out at less than two minutes. For an example, see "Dittohead". To their credit, they're waaay good at shred metal guitar, their drummer can play an album's worth of kick drum in one song, and their lyrics are even clever every now and then.

The Slits - more girls yelling. Can't get enough, it seems. Thanks, mle!

Slowdive - did a catchy song entitled "Alison". I'll tell you someday...

Smith and Reno - the musicians who recorded "Dueling Banjos" for the movie "Deliverance". Ironically, it's a banjo and a guitar, not two banjos. However, this song has been getting musicians to play together for ages, and isn't that what it's all about?

Snoop Dogg - love or hate him all you want for his completely fam-unfriendly lyrics and ho-bsession, Mr. D-To-The-Double-G deserves just as much respect as love or hatred. First of all, he knows his roots: check out his collaborations with, covers of, and covers [of his stuff] by the founders of funk, rap, nonsense; George Clinton and the rest of Parliament, for example, appear on several of his albums... Wow.

Second, Snoop has created his own language. Ever heard him called "Snoop Diggity"? Has anyone inserted gratuitous z's in words you otherwise know, i.e. "Fo shizzle!" or "the K Grizzle Fizzle" (aka Kyle Griffith (ok, maybe I'm the only one who calls him that))? It's Snoop's invention, and we're all grateful.

To summarize both of these Snooproperties, I provide this quote from Bootsy Collins (Parliament = funk) in a Fatboy Slim cover (electronica) of Steve Miller Band's "The Joker" (classic rock):

"[...] fo' shizzle dizzle, my nizzle fizzle bizzle"

What does that even mean?? It means Snoop is omnipresent and omnipotent.

Snow Patrol - slightly dark, yet still happy "indie pop", whatever that is. I don't think sing-songy people with acoustic guitars can avoid the happy vibe.

Soft Cell - pathetic confession: I knew about their 80's hit "Tainted Love" first from one of the Coneheads movies, then from Marilyn Manson, both long before hearing the original version. For shame, jlaz, for shame.

Soul Coughing - somewhere along the line, a few of the best groove jazz musicians on the planet bumped into one of the hipsterest beat poets on the planet, and Soul Coughing was born. My bro introduced this group to me on one of many unfathomably long trips from Carlinville to Indianapolis; we listened to their second album, "Irresistable Bliss", three times in a row, conveniently on my other bro's new bass-heavy truck speakers. I was addicted. Then we listened to their super mega 100% weird first album, "Ruby Vroom". I was in love.

This is still one of my favorite bands. This is why I have an upright bass. This is why I think counting to 100 by 5's is a perfectly acceptable set of lyrics. Most importantly, this is one of the reasons why I will play bass again.

Soulard Blues Band - genuine St. Louis blues! There's a reason why the hockey team, as well as a Glenn Miller song, has that name, after all. For your daily geography lesson, Soulard refers to a huge load of local stuff in the STL area.

The Sounds - they're not living in America, and they're not sorry. I don't know where they are living, though, and I'm not about to do any research. Any help? They sound quasi-Scandanavian, but who knows. Anyway, fun sing-songy girl punk, I say non-sexistly.

The Specials - real ska. Nothing more, nothing less.

Stabbing Westward - cool enough to be the subject of a Wesley Willis song! Maybe that's not a sufficient condition for coolness.

The Stampeders - known for the oldies-trippy, banjorrific "Sweet City Woman", and special to me because [permanently my secret]

Stan Kenton - jazz musician whose group cranked out the most joyously dissonant rendition of "The Peanut Vendor" I've ever heard. Not high-school-jazz-band-ooh-they're-pretty-bad dissonance, either... It's cold, cruel, calculated chromatic crackpottery. Translation: certified jlink tasty.

For those who are jazz novices but nerd experts, "The Peanut Vendor" (not Mr. Kenton's version) is the song playing at the end of Office Space, when Milton is chillin'/complaining on the beach. Ha, now you have an excuse to watch that whole movie!

Stanley Clarke - one of the earlier slap-n-pop jazz/funk bassists. "If This Bass Could Talk," he writes, it would probably say "ouch!"

The Staple Singers - dare I say, a staple of funk's beginnings. I'm not particularly attached to them (har har), but you can't deny the funkdamentals.

Steppenwolf - you know, "Born To Be Wild", "Magic Carpet Ride", and an assortment of lesser-known classic rock/oldies tunes. A+ for blurring the line between popular and psychedelic.

Stereo Total - crazy girls, and a guy I think?, singing what sound like children's songs in English, German, and French! Emphasis on "sounds like". Songs include "I Love You, Ono", "Tout Le Monde Se Fout Des Fleurs", "Sous La Douche", and "Partir Ou Mourir"... I don't recommend translating those for your kids. Leave it to the mle to supply the best foreign nonsense :-)

Stevie Ray Vaughan - the quintessential blues guitarist. When I went sailing with the Scouts down around Key West, my boat's megahippie captain played nothing but Stevie Ray concert tapes and John Denver albums. If only I had known enough to appreciate the mastery... Of the Stevie Ray solos - forget John Denver.

For bonus points, this is the same megahippie who taught me how to play the didgeridoo, and how to circle-breathe (poorly) on said tube.

Stevie Wonder - golden across several decades and genres. Direct your questions about ebony and ivory straight to him, as he's Misstra Know It All (not to be confused with Mr. Knowitall, who's waiting for P day... and nobody will get that reference). Personally, I think it's a superstition: the writing's on the wall.

Styx - mostly famous for epic ballads like "Come Sail Away" (or was that Eric Cartman?), but who cares? By the magical illogic of popular music, "Mr. Roboto" somehow was a smash hit. The most pathetic/awesome part is that everyone knows it. Domo arigato, offensive-to-Eastern-culturo.

The Sugar Hill Gang - the only SH-Gang song I know of is "Rapper's Delight", which is - surprise! - a rap among three or so DJs that starts out with an extremely groovy bass line and catchy, witty banter among the emcees... And over the course of OVER FIFTEEN MINUTES, degrades to stories about Superman and dinner at a friend's house. The bass line never degrades, though. In my glory days of wasted time, I had this whole monster memorized; now I can't think of much more than something about Kaopectate.

The Sugarcubes - pre-Björk Björk. Approximately unlistenable, and I already mentioned that I enjoy stuff like Shi-Yue and the whole digital hardcore genre.

The Surfaris - hyah, wipeout. Appears to be what they did with the rest of their songs?

Suspended - Illinois Wesleyan's male a capella group. As a music and theatre school, you can safely guess that they were pretty good. Live performances were hi-qual too, as they joked around the whole time, and IWU was small enough that everyone knew everyone else. Weee.

My apologies to A Touch Of Class, IWU's female a capella crew - I never had the chance to see/hear!

The Sword - impressive hard rock/not quite metal, with some bizarre borderline-fantasy themes. Gots da skilz, ey do. Props to the S-bro for exposure, although they were apparently in one of the Guitar Hero games as well.

System Of A Down - no, that's not correct capitalization, but oh well. They're closer to pop than I usually get, but I heart the stuff that was too nuts to play on the radio. Bonus points to front man Serj Tankian for collaborating with Buckethead; anti-bonus to jarmstro's bro for playing that same SOAD song on the keyboard in the shed, quite ad nauseam. Meh. Any tales from the gallery - probably those approximately my age?

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Done. I didn't even proofread that mess... Anyway, there are my 2300+ words. Now add yours!